What determines a true friendship for me is the ability to be myself, the freedom to speak my mind and the truth despite the consequences. I have a variety of friendships with several people, motivated by my pure, raw emotions.
I use the feelings I get to tell me whether or not I should be one way or another with each individual. However there’s a list of standards that governs all my friendships and that model have ended some friendships because the signature ways of being in my eyes were not met.
Indication for ending a 5 year friendship was so blatant that the decision was to either end the friendship or keep on but with a different set of approaches that would eventually render the union meaningless. My friend felt comfortable lying to me about an incident that placed me in a bad light with a third party. I didn’t know that was the case until the individual contacted me and by their behaviour i deduced that I was lied to by my friend. If you feel it necessary to lie and with a sense of ease that’s when a friendship should end.
A friendship that limits our model of communication and increases the walk away syndrome.Case in point,we are friends who have material interest, hers being immeasurably greater than mine. My interactions with her always left me with a feeling of emptiness and a brain freeze. Another side effect was a lack of motivation to call, hang out or share. A more than subtle sign that this friendship indeed needs to end.
A friendship based on trust that was shattered because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut. She felt compelled to be interesting so she released my two way conversation, contracted for silence, to the ear of another. I am exposed to a stranger who is very familiar with ME. I can’t no longer trust her as far as I can throw her. My friendship with her definitely ended.
This last friendship bust was a rarity. One with a guy who I once felt the utmost comfort to strip naked in front of and think nothing of it, naivety, maybe. I thought if he couldn’t stand the heat that he would get out of the kitchen. The bravery of this guy; sitting there but standing at attention and somehow felt he couldn’t take it no more so he pounced at me. Surprise, a little. Violated, hell yes!.I can no longer look at him the same way nor in the eye. He was a friend who i thought didn’t even consider me as his type, now wants to get into me. Well without being too repetitive,I ended the friendship.
The countless meaning of the word friend. When it becomes obvious that the friend nor the friendship no longer suit you or plays a significant role in any part of your day to day interactions, that’s a sign that a friendship needs to end.