Gaydar, a term used for some people’s intuitive ability to detect other people’s propensity for being attracted to the same sex, is nothing more than a best guess. The term is meant to sound mechanical, like radar. But, radar is much more fool proof.
In actuality, if a person is gay and has not sworn themselves to a life of celibacy, they have to be willing to put out some clues. Those individuals that gift themselves with the power of “gaydar” are simply trying to say that they are better at pin pointing subtle hints than most of the other people they know.
Due to the delicate nature of sexuality, and society’s sometimes complete aversion to homosexuality, some people are much more shy about the clues they make available. Subtlety is their best defence against prejudice and adverse reactions from their peers. After all, letting the wrong people know of a person’s sexual orientation could impact their ability to not only earn a living but, also stay away from physical harm. Just look at what happened on Jenny Jones.
Some people are fearless, and some are defiant. Those that are really out there, or flaming, have gay written all over them and no amount of metro sexuality will cover it up. They are the ones that were assless chaps on top of the gay pride floats. Others, wear suits and ties to their jobs as CEO’s of Fortune 500 companies and work toward curing childhood diabetes. Others still work as education professionals helping sculpt young minds. For those people, it would be career suicide to be so open about their personal choices. Still, everybody wants to be loved and has certain physical needs.
The other side of the coin is that it really does take one to know one. If we, ourselves, possess certain qualities, these are easier to detect in others. We know what to look for. A Polish person can spot another Pole from across a crowded room while staring at the back of their head. This is true for any group that is closely linked into their personal identity. This is no more a function of any sort of radar than an ability to be at peace with oneself and see in others mutually shared qualities. Those that profess to have “gaydar” are just looking for bragging rights and false attention. They are also the ones most likely to get beat to a pulp in a dark alley when their “gaydar” malfunctions at the wrong time, and in the wrong place.