It is a “man’s world” for a reason. Long gone are the days when women had to fight for basic rights. Essentially, we have won. We have achieved equal status to men in the eye’s of the law. Why, then, have woman still failed to gain the social status of their male counterparts? Simple. Most women are too busy fighting amongst themselves to get anything done.
Consider your typical circle of female friends. You will usually find two types of women in this group: the leader and the followers. This pack mentality is very similar to that of dogs. If one of the pack-members disagrees with the Alpha dog, chaos ensues. The Alpha dog will attempt to turn the rest of her pack against the “traitor”, while the “traitor” will likely attempt to rally the support of the pack herself and bring down the current Alpha dog. A third type of female does exist, however. This is one who looks for equals among friends and will not attempt to usurp the pack, but will leave the group with her tail between her legs instead. Women in this third group are typically not involved in one enormous clique, anyway. They tend to bounce around between several smaller groups.
So how does this mentality among women hurt our progress? Simple. It discourages independent thought. We, as human beings, are social creatures, but when we develop this type of hierarchy, we stop thinking for ourselves. We are part of a mob, and as anyone who has taken Sociology 101 knows, a mob only has one brain. Wherever our mob goes, we follow.
What sets men apart? Men also tend toward a group of their own sex, but their dynamic is completely different. You cannot usually discern a true leader in a male pack. There may be an individual who instigates most of the dude activities, but this is hardly the same thing. When two males in a given group disagree, it does not become a pack matter. Two men will be “men” about the situation and deal with it themselves. Why are they so different?
My theory is this: on the outside, at least, men are more independent. They do not readily reveal their insecurities to their friends and therefore do not become completely dependent on their buddies for emotional support. Woman cannot stop themselves from exposing all their insecurities to their friends. They begin relying so much on their girls for their own emotional survival that they forget how to take care of it on their own. So within a female group, one will arise who is a little wiser than the others. She herself will have plenty of anxieties but will be clever enough to hide them. She will then become the queen of her pack, adored by all her followers.
So, what do we do?! Stop gossiping among friends! Do not limit yourself to one group of friends! If you disagree with a friend, talk to her (and ONLY her)! Do not let someone else do your thinking for you! Most importantly, ladies, treat each and every one of your precious female friends as an equal. We, as women, have in us an amazing capacity to love and nurture each other. Let us not waste it just to “fit in”.